Deep Breaths

Sometimes I feel relaxed or re-energized after a MOPS meeting. Sometimes I walk out with wide eyes and mind reeling. The latter has been the case for the last two meetings. Our very own ER doc, Kim Thivierge spoke to us earlier this month about taking care of our children in emergency situations. At first I sat there with my mouth open instead of taking notes on how many chest thrusts to administer during CPR.

Dr. Kim is a great friend to have

Kim's big on minimizing the risk. She went through a long list of things to avoid and/or keep an eye out for. Car seat safety (pull that clip up to their chest and keep it tight), choking hazards (bad bad button batteries), bolting furniture to the wall, hide n seek in the car- keep it locked so they don't go hide, put out the cones in the drive-way and helmets please! Poison control should be in your phone (800)222-1222! Talk to your children about their body parts using real words. Open conversations with friends and parents about risks, who is in the house and gun safety. Standing water around the house, fitted sheets only in a crib, jump ropes around the neck, playground safety, concussions- oh my! This would have been a good meeting for mimosas! 

Happy Birthday April Hot Mamas!

The good news is that we have this awesome support system. If you need a breather, one of us will watch your kids. Need some prayers? Laurie has a running list! On your way to the ER? We'll bring you dinner. This group has your back. That's a good segway to this week's speaker. But first, a few fun pics...

Movie Night to see Blockers! A good belly laugh is chicken soup for my soul!

Pick a Park Friday at Mandarin park was gorgeous!

So, what happens when the stress of raising these sweet children gets to be too much? You know what I mean- when it bottles up and you start to see red. Anger. Maria Inoa spoke to us this morning on how to manage our anger. Self awareness is key. Do you feel yourself getting hotter? Do you notice the body cues? We need to learn some self care skills and give ourselves some grace. There are many layers here. Spiritual, getting some quiet time, reading scripture, praise and worship. Physical- exercising, yoga and stretching. Mental and emotional- journaling, crying, support, adult time (we have a girls night on Wednesday!). It's good to normalize feeling words for your kids. It's okay that they see you cry and hear you YELL! You are human. 

Maria Inoa sharing her wisdom

Check out her contact info

Practice the pause. Take some deep breaths. Meditate. Mary Lynn told me about this app. This is something you have to practice doing. Take time outs. Ask for help. There's a whole Facebook group of people waiting to be asked. It's taken me years to finally start asking. Try Psychology Today for a counselor that fits you. It's okay to shop around. And in the heat of the moment, if you're seeing red and just can't calm down. You can always call this parent hotline: 1-854-4-A-PARENT. 

Mentor Mom, Perrin giving us wisdom in the thick of it

We've got this ladies! Breathe in. Breathe out. Let's go do some zumba!

For current members, registration for next year is out! Check your email for the link! Are you on the waitlist? You should get an email next week to register. I'll post a link here when it's open to the public. You've got to act fast when you see it. Nursery space fills up quickly! Find your Fire is next year's theme. It's going to be good! You won't want to miss it!

Observe, Don't Absorb

We are so lucky to have had Dr. Linda Miles come talk to us last week! Great timing for me since my anniversary was the following day. But also just when thinking with relationships in general. It felt great to be reminded that I am in control of me! I loved when Linda said, "Forgiveness is letting go of the idea you can change the past." Forgiveness is such a big part of moving on and getting over it, but man is that hard to do! She talked a lot of the biology of your body and what is happening when you get upset. Cortisone and adrenaline spike when you're angry. Dumping these chemicals a bunch over time is not good for you. Think about how you feel when you snuggle with your baby.

Rockstar mom, Erica here with newborn Evan!

It's that oxytocin and dopamine. Let's get more of that feeling! Take a break and get out of there. Fight with your head. "Wait 'til the iron is NOT hot." Try to learn the root. Why do you fight like that? I've been talking about Buck and Nadine all week! Ya'll have not seen my Nadine! But we can get nasty when we fight. If a fight lasts more than 2 minutes, it's about something else. Don't console; walk away when someone else is acting crazy. Later, say "we have this pattern". Tell me about what happens to you? How can we fight better? My husband and I talked about taking a time out. I'm not sure who's going to be the one to suggest this, though. I'll keep you posted!

Bunny's mentor moment has us all ears!

Dr. Linda Miles- Change Your Story, Change Your Brain

Hand outs from the meeting

Hand outs from the meeting

How can you accept a new reality? Flexible families are the happy ones. Even in awful situations, no one can take your mind away. You don't have to react. We need to practice being re-centered. How can you tune out and get in a good place? Marriage is a dance. Teach your children compassion. "How do you think that person felt?" You can be tough but still have compassion. You are the main role model. A lot of personality is genetic, but you don't have to take in the toxicity. Look from a detached point of view. I don't need to drop all these chemicals in my body. 

Observe; don't Absorb. Wow! That's good stuff!

Own your reactions. Add that power (instead of judging) to a higher power. Strong isn't mean. Train your children to do this, too. Keep them curious, get them to think. Dr. Miles passed along this link to help your kids with this, too. 

Check out her new book, Change Your Story, Change Your Brain.

To help us get in this happy, relaxed place, we have lots of activities! This month we did a take away meal girls night. Moms left with 5 meals ready to freeze for later. We had an Easter egg hunt for the kids at the park. (I'm loving turning all the play dates into work out play dates, too!) On Good Friday we did the Stations of the Cross for kids out at Marywood. We got this, ladies!

A nature trail to the next station. Each egg had a symbol for that station of the cross. Perfect for our kids to understand the true meaning of Easter!

Searching for eggs!