The struggle is real!

Maybe I am a bit predjudice because our speaker today was a friend but I thought it was such a great and uplifting meeting. Not only was or speaker, Maria Chrissovergis fantastic, our mentor mom moment was beautiful. Thank you Jan for having us pair up and give each other some words of affirmation. I had a very sweet conversation with Lauren Hogan and left with my head held high. For those of you who were not there here are a few things that really stuck out for me from both our mentor moment and our talk with Maria.

- Notice goodness in your husband, children, and people you may take for granted and tell them what you notice. Words of affirmation can really go far. 

- Don't compare relationships, find out what works in your family unit, your marriage, and each individual relationship. 

- Look at the abundance in your life, don't focus on the bad.

- Try to be in the moment 

- Everyday is a different struggle 

- Pray for peace and not patience 

- Take time for yourself, even if just 15 minutes a day. 

- Do not focus on obtaining the perfect balance in your life just take it day by day.

- At the end of the day give it to God because the struggle is real!

I can't believe we only have ONE meeting left! This group is truely one of my favorite things about being a mother. How crazy is that!? I love you ladies and feel so blessed to have your love and support. 

Signing off as this years blogger,

Jessica 

Staying Alive!

Today's meeting was on CPR and safety. Our in house Doctor Thivierge gave an excellent talk on how to keep our babies safer. Here is a little overview of what we learned today. 

CPR:

- Good CPR saves lives

- 1st thing to do if a child is unresponsive, call for help or have someone else call for help. 

- for an infant (less than 1) push jaw open to see if there is anything in their mouth. If not, start compressions. Press both thumbs in their chest (between the nipples) to the beat of Staying Alive (100 beats per minute). 30 beats, then two breathes. If there are two people do 15 beats and then 2 breathes. 

- over 1 year old to puberty, lay them on the ground on their backs and start compressions, use one hand (the palm of your hand). You should be going into the chest about 2 inches. Same count for compressions. 

- after puberty or for a large child use two hands. 

- hold the nose when breathing into mouth. Try to get the chest to rise. For infants you may have to put your mouth over the nose and mouth. 

Chocking: 

- whole grapes are a big No No! Cut longways. 

- hot dogs must be cut in half (long ways) not into rounds or give them a whole one to chew on

- popcorn is another one to watch close

- don't touch a child that is coughing and choking, don't put your finger in their mouth, just encourage them to keep coughing it up

- if they stop making noise or turn blue or are infants, then you may act

- children less than 1, hold them by their chin facing down to the ground, torso higher than their head, hit their backs 5 times. Turn them over, look in their mouth, if you see something remove it from their mouth. Do not do a blind finger sweep. Do that over and over until the object comes out or until they become unconscious. If they become unresponsive start CPR.

- in an older child (1ish) kneel behind them and wrap your arms around them palms of your hands in their belly to start thrusts.

- If a child swallows a button battery, magnet, or anything sharp don't let it pass through. Go to the ER right away. 

- Be careful with balloons. If they pop pick up all the pieces immediately. 

Extra safety tips: 

- #1 death of infants is suffocation. Do not put anything in a crib with baby. Always place them on their back to sleep. 

- always keep a close eye on a child around water. Even advanced swimmers can get tired and drown. 

- always make your child wear a helmet when bike riding, skating, etc. 

Concussions:

- If a child falls on their frontal scalp and immediately starts crying they are usually ok. As long as they are not vomiting, did not loose consciousness, all is good. Just monitor them for 24 hours. Falling on the back, top, or sides of their head at more than 4 feet is dangerous and likely to cause a concussion. 

- the danger with a concussion is to get another head injury within two weeks of the first concussion. 

- do not go into the ER asking for a head CT. Only get one if the Doctor recommends it for your child. CTs will expose your child to radiation. So, if the doctor does not feel it is needed, trust their judgement. 

Thanks again Kim for the awesome Talk! 

Also, happiest of birthdays to these lovely ladies!

Now I have to go tie up all the blind cords in my house! 

Sending you all safe vibes,

Jessica 

Let's Talk About Sex Baby!

Sex for couples with young children can be complicated. So, it was with great pleasure we welcomed clinical sexologist, Dr. Noelle Pomeroy to come speak to our group. 

It isn't strange or uncommon for couples of young children to rarely have sex. In fact the hormones in our bodies keep our sex drive low after having a baby. Before birth control, this is what kept people from having babies too close together. So, it is completely normal to not be ready to jump back in bed when your doctor gives you the ok at 6 weeks.

However, after the babies grow into toddlers and the breast feeding stops, some of us still don't regain that lust we had in our early twenties. So, Dr. Pomeroy gave us some tips on ramping up our sex lives. 

- Give yourself an hour or so before having sex to spend one on one time with your partner without technology. This will help you to unwind, reconnect and relax. Unlike most men, most women need time to clear their mind and let go of their busy day to be able to get in the mood for sex. 

- Try to identify the things that stress you out or weigh heavy on you. Sometimes our lack of interest in sex has nothing to do with sex or our partner, but outside circumstances that are effecting our mood. 

- If you don't think it is an outside factor and you are worried it is something physical have your doctor check your hormone levels. There is the possibility you have low testosterone levels and a small tweek can change your love life. 

- Create a flirty game with your partner. You could have a jar and assign a color marble to yourself and another color to your partner. On days you are in the mood put your marble in the jar. 

- Invest in toys. The Magic Wand came highly recommended from Dr. Pomeroy as a tool to help women become aroused.  

- Don't count out that your husband also may need a little help with his sex drive. Try to have an open dialogue about what he wants and what he may struggle with. 

- If sex is painful after childbirth, see a professional. There are things that can be done to help. 

- Go to mojoupgrade.com. This is a site that will allow you and your husband to both take a quiz about what things you may want to try in the bedroom. Once you both complete it only the things you both chose will show up in the results. 

There are lots of options and resources if you feel like your sex life is in a rut. And if you can't figure it out on your own, it is a great idea to go talk to someone. Whether it be Dr. Pomeroy or a marriage counselor, it can't hurt to talk to a third party.

I hope you all have a very romantic Valentine's Day! 

Xoxo,

Jessica 

How We Got Our Blessings

I meant to take some photos of everyone's awesome mugs to share, but I completely spaced, which seems to be happening a lot lately. But I would like to say thank you to Gara and Emily. It was a great craft meeting and I love my mug! I mean Lucy even did the craft, that is saying something! 

I did want to touch on something Bunny said during her mentor moment. With Thanksgiving coming up in a few days it is the time when we think of all our blessings and ways to give back to others. But I don't know if we often acknowledge something that Bunny said, which is how we got our blessings.

I read an article (link below) the other day about this very topic. It talked about explaining to your kids why it is important to give to others by explaining to them ways your family has been given to. I highly recommend reading the article. 

It made me think about ways my family and I have benefited from others giving. Thinking all the way back to my father's family being accepted into this country from Greece through Ellis Island, to myself getting to study in a state of the art sculpture lab because alumni generously donated to UNF. I thought about when my husband lost his job and we were able to make ends meet by collecting unemployment until he found another job. My grandmother overcoming cancer because of advancements in medicine that other people funded by donating to cancer research. Even things like the incredible childhood I had because my parents were selfless and provided the best they could. It really made me realize I have a lot to pay forward and I hope my kids feel the same. 

I challenge you all to think of the ways your family has benefited from others giving. Whether it is government programs funded by the taxes people pay, private donations that have helped your family in one way or another, or just someone with a good heart that has made your life a little better. I bet you can make a pretty long list! 

With a thankful heart,

Jessica 

http://mobile.nytimes.com/blogs/parenting/2015/10/28/to-teach-children-to-give-tell-them-how-much-your-family-has-been-given/?_r=0&referer=

Be simple. Be sophisticated.

Today's meeting was fantastic! Our speakers were wonderful and the honesty everyone shared is what makes MOPS so special to me. 

I came home and emailed my mother-in-law. I shared the Momastery article with her and thanked her for her masterpiece (don't tell Nick I referred to him as a masterpiece, his head is big enough). I have a hard time with the fact that my family and Nick's family operate very differently. I try to remind myself that it all comes from a loving place, which is what matters the most, but I don't always act in the kindest or in the most sophisticated way. 

The article, which if you haven't read please do yourself a favor and read it now (link below), really hit me. I was a teary eyed mess when I read the last paragraph. I saved this quote in my phone, "Be kinder than necessary, being mindful that the piece of art it took her a lifetime to weave, her masterpiece, she gave to you, to keep you warm at night. One day you’ll give your masterpiece away, too. Be simple. Be sophisticated." 

As a mother of two boys the thought that one day I will have to let them go breaks my heart a little. I will do my best to think of the above quote when I find myself frustrated with my in-laws. 

Momastery link: http://momastery.com/blog/2012/01/11/on-weaving-and-repentance-2/

Feeling humbled, 

Jessica 

Time to Get Cooking!

So, as I am procrastinating making dinner why not write this blog post about our cooking meeting. Maybe I will get inspired! 

Monday's meeting was fantastic! Ali did an awesome job and had great handouts with tips, recipes, menu planning, and more. If you didn't make it to the meeting or you didn't take your handouts home, don't fret, you should get an email soon with the handouts attached. I highly recommend reading them!

The meeting started with a great mentor moment from Bunny. She reminded us that our husbands need a "stroke" every now and then. I found her talk to be very fitting for the cooking meeting because as they say, "The way to a man's heart is his stomach." And that couldn't be more true for my Nick. His love language is food and cooking him a meal is definitely a way to show him he is appreciated. 

Since Ali did such a great job with the handouts, I am just going to share a few tips I picked up at the meeting. 

- Publix will cook your fish or shrimp for you! You pick out what fish you want and they will cook it while you finish your shopping. 

- Crockpot liners save you from the dreaded cleanup. 

- Publix will roll their pizza doe out for you! 

- Tuesdays at Fresh Market is $2.99 a pound chicken breast and ground beef

- Let kids help pick out veggies at the grocery store and help cook them so they are more likely to eat them. 

- Start a small garden to get kids interested in eating things from the earth 

- Sharpen your knives often with a 2-stage sharpener 

- Don't over think it! 

There are plenty of nights my kids get breakfast for dinner or Mac and cheese, chicken nuggets, and a frozen veg. that I steam and sprinkle some cheese on so they try a bite or two. On those nights I just have to find another way to "stroke" my husband's ego! 😝

I picked the below flyer up from Publix today. I am definitely going to try it out next week! 

Time to get cooking,

Jessica 

This is a gift, not a burden.

Vanessa did such an awesome job at the photography meeting! I was very impressed by her excellent teaching skills. Her handouts were great too! Since she was so thorough, I am just going to share some pictures I took during the meeting and then highlight a few things that Jan said in our always inspirational mentor moment. 

Our awesome photography teacher for the day!

Eager students soaking up the knowledge. 

Everyone learning more about their cameras.

Now,on to my take aways from Jan's mentor moment...

It is always nice to hear that parenting is hard. I know that it is, but sometimes I get stuck on the idea that maybe I am the only one who it is THIS hard for. One of my favorite things Jan said was, "Parenting is hard, you aren't doing anything wrong." This hit me, because I am always thinking, what am I doing wrong? What should I be doing different? Am I not disciplining them enough? Am I disciplining them too much? And the list goes on and on. It is great to be reminded that we are doing the best we can and it will never be perfect because parenting is just HARD. 

Another quote that hit home was, "This is a gift, not a burden." This was my mantra this morning as we were running late trying to get ready for school. My three year old was laying by the toilet screaming and crying because he couldn't decide if he wanted to use the stool to pee or not use the stool. "This is a gift, not a burden. This is a gift, not a burden! This a gift, not a BURDEN!!!"

I wish now I would have gotten my camera out, set my ISO for inside light and snapped that precious moment, but I was too busy trying not to loose my sh*%!

Just trying to hold it all together,

Jessica